Lincoln Logger

I work with some people who take some nasty smelling shits and especially this one guy. I work with this guy named Don Lincoln who lives in New Hampshire what is like a two hour drive away from our work. He is a huge drunk and nascar fan. He always wears shirts that are very inappropriate for work and has ripped jeans where you can see his yellow stained white undies and an ass cheek now and then. He is a good worker but he always complains and never does anything to fix it. Every morning for break he eats nothing but hot pockets and or microwavable dinners which are probably the major factor on his shit smells.
So here is the blog. I like to crap in nice and clean areas. Since I have worked on a farm I can shit about anywhere now so I am a lot better at getting comfortable for the number 2. But this man is so gross. First off he would pass out on the toilet. We have an automatic light switch that comes on when you come in and turns off 15 about 15 minutes after everyone leaves the bathroom so you have to be completely still if you stayed in the bathroom for the light to shut off.
I would come in the bathroom and the light would be off and he would be still shitting in one of the stall. I have actually timed him on an hour of him shitting. And the smell that comes from it is putrid. It doesn't smell like shit but something some evil Nazi scientist invented. Like it is not a human smell it smells like decaying flesh and turd and a curdled strawberry milk shake.
So after he is done and gone I would come in to use it and there would be his ass shavings (crinkled up shit stained dingle berries) all over the toilet seat and some ass hair. There would be crumpled up tissue paper on the side of the toilet on top of the heater (no idea what is contained in it) and the inside of the toilet bowl would be stained in areas where it is physically impossible to have your shit touch it unless you picked it up with your hands and spread it there.
He also has a thing for his supervisor because he feels the guy stole the job from him that he could have got. The guy has the smarts and understands every job process but for him to manage people when he is still drunk til lunch time and the fact you see his dick pop out from the rip in his pants I think played a major role in him not getting the job. So anyways his supervisor takes care of any of the facility's bathroom problems like clogged toilets.
This asshole would clog the toilet with toilet paper then shit on top of the toilet paper then flush it. So who ever tries to plunge it would have to stir up shit and splash it around in order to unclog the toilet. not to mention after he does this before someone would unclog it he would flush it so shitty water would overflow all over the toilet then all over the bathroom floor. I know it is him because one time I came in and he just must have flushed it because he was just chilling in front of the mirror picking his fingernails (probably getting out the shit crust) like nothing happened while the floor is covered with tanned shit water.
We nicknamed this problem Lincoln Logs naturally after him.