My Dog is Dead

Yes my dog is dead. We had to put him unexpectedly down last Christmas Eve, and on top of that it was his birthday. Poor bastard. And if anyone says putting down a dog through a Vet is humane well you didn't experience what I went through when we did it to my dog. First the poor dog knew and shit everywhere. Second the stuff they gave him must have not been enough because when they left the room so me and my mother could have a minute with him he started convulsing and his lips curled up. This was the saddest fucking thing I have ever experienced. I will never have a dog again and go through this shit again. I can't imagine what it must feel like when people lose their kids. I'm going to skip that feeling by getting my nuts snipped.
But all jokes aside it was pretty depressing. His head or his mental state was fine but his body couldn't take it no more. I wish I could have spent more time with him or been there for him a little more. I took his company for granted and "shooed" him away when ever he bothered me for some love. I feel like a big bag of shit stuffed into another big bag of shit.
So basically what I am trying to get at is don't take your loved ones for granted. Even when they are annoying as shit and you want to tell them to go fuck themselves. Because one day you may not be able to tell them to go fuck themselves ever again.

Midget Sex or Pedophelia

With my daily web browsing of pornography I usually come across midget sex now and then. Also sometimes I watch it. Now I usually get a good laugh when it is a midget man with an enormous dong railing some girl, but I don't laugh so much when it is a full blown man railing a midget woman. Yes what I stated was pretty contrary but I get the feeling when it is a midget woman that it is sort of like child pornography. And well I'm sort of not big into child pornography at all, not even a little bit, I actually just gagged at seeing the word child in front of pornography.
So I came up with a solution that could help out pedophiles (Not that I would want to help them out, but anything to steer them away from children I will do), lets give them midgets instead of kids. Hey I know, what about the poor midgets? Well to be honest I could give a fuck less. If a midget has to have sex with some creep in order for a child not to get fucked in the head for the rest of their lives then lets go for it. And there must be some midget whores out there who don't care about being degraded or violated.

Public Transportation

Because of my inability to follow the law I must now take public transportation. My free rides all been ridden out and now I have to succumb to getting around by the bus. It is not so bad if you don't have to wait in the freezing cold for a late bus or happen to miss a bus by 15 seconds while it is raining cats and dogs outside while you are running beside the bus yelling at the stupid fucking driver to stop for a minute. But if you can get by that its pretty cool. You get to see the inside of your city or area and find all the beautiful and interesting people who live in your area.
For example the "fat people who don't like to take baths", the "I lost all my teeth five years ago and I'm going to keep on smiling to let you all know" people, the "I have five kids from all different fathers and I don't like to discipline them when they run around and scream" people, the "lets talk extremely loud on my cell phone and act bad ass so people think I'm cool" people, the "Just go out of the mental hospital" people, the "going to rehab" and "coming out of rehab" people, and so on and so forth.
Also while waiting for the bus you meet a lot of great people like one of my favorites the "can I have a dollar for the bus I never take" people and the "can I have some change I am not a bum" people. You know if they would just ask me for a dollar with out the lame ass excuse I would give them one every fucking time. Then what is even better that I love because they hold my ass up from getting on the connecting bus or miss it all together is the "Where did my money go or can anyone break a twenty dollar bill?" people and what is even better about them is it happens to them all of the fucking time.
Then you got the bus drivers a whole different kind of people. They are mostly cool and laid back but some are real fucking assholes. I guess having to deal with some stupid people or having to deal with people that give them attitudes they now all think everyone is like that. I had one talk to me like a child and told me to hold on til they come back around and pick me up on the opposite side. Now technically if I wanted to be an asshole (which I am) I had a 30 day bus pass and I can use the bus as much as I want. But I decided to listen to the cunt and put on a big smile when she came back around 20 minutes later. She was surprised I was still there and she was surprised I was still smiling. See you got to fight bullshit with friendliness.

Good Morning Mr. Wood

Morning Wood? What is the big deal with this. Honestly everyone since I was a teen has talked about their morning wood or has made a comment on morning wood. I will tell you no lie when I say I have never ever had morning wood. Since I have first heard of this phenomenon I have been just ready to wake up to a smurf tent. But no not even a chubby.
Now there is nothing wrong with my junk, I get random hard-ons all of the time. I think I actually get more than the regular Joe. I can direct the flow of blood right to my penis with out thinking of sex, it could happen at any minute even right now as I write.
So what is the deal with me not getting any major wood in the morning. Perhaps I have delayed erections and instead of getting a boner when I wake up, it decided to pop up while I brush my teethe.
I don't know but I am not sure why this has never happened to me, and I am starting to feel left out in the conversations when guys talk about their morning wood and I have to make some shit up like how Steve Carrel talked about feeling boobies in the 40 Year Old Virgin.