Good Bye Old Fucking Chinese New Year

Well last Chinese New Year happened to be my year which is the boar. At the beginning of the year my Vietnamese friend told me that it could either mean I will have great luck or that I will have really fucking pitiful fuck me silly with an orange cone bad luck. Well it turned out to be the latter and the orange cone was mostly my own stupidity plus the justice system or as I like to call them "Money Hungry Whores" or "Molesters of Wallets and life".
Last year was fucking horrible and like I said it was mostly my fault but I truly did not mean it. I crashed my car and into several other peoples cars. I got on probation and have to go to more meetings then the fucking president. I have to pay them oodles and oodles of money and plus well I can kiss any car insurance good bye because I heard they are not taking souls as a down payment at the moment.
I have also become addicted to a favorite substance I would like to call Oxys because well during the time it made me not give a flying fuck about all the drama that was circulating around my life. Also my dog had to be put down and that experience was awesome. I couldn't go to a few important weddings and now including my sister's birth because well the "Money Hungry Whores" just don't want their money travelling around.
But I do say I have experienced a lot. I am no longer an addict. I will never drink and drive again well I will never drink again period. I learned what it feels like to hit total rock bottom and slowly climb out of it. I have a new perspective on life due to my meetings and meeting some really fucked up individuals who live amongst us including myself. And well I have learned to appreciate the small things in life.
And you say that the your Chinese Year will bring you good luck or bad luck on my next blog I will talk about a crazy ass incident that happened to me right before the New Chinese New Year. It is about work and well I can't write about it while I'm at work.

Mushrooms

I have dabbled in a lot of drugs during my time of life. But when it came to psychedelics I always had a love for them. Acid I do not like because it is dirty and not natural. Also there is a chance you could get fucked on it for the rest of your life. But when it comes to mushrooms it is very natural and no matter what it will wear off and go away. What I like most about mushrooms is the realization of things that it can open up for you. It is definitely something that everyone should try at least once in your life. I had a lot of great times on mushrooms and some really friggin bad ones where I didn't know what the hell was going on. One time I took some really potent ones and I saw some really scary stuff. But when it comes to a bad trip the thing you can count on is just tell yourself that soon it will be over. Now back into why I think everyone should try them. The reason why I believe this is because it opens up a light on some issues in your life that you are either ignorant to see or your regular state of mind doesn't allow you to think past to see this. For instance I was going through a really bad time at one point of my life and I couldn't get over it. Nothing I did or thought could get me out of the feeling I was experiencing. So I managed to get my hands on some mushrooms and when I started to trip these issues I had all of suddenly became crystal clear. I ventured deep into my psych and into my soul and started to evaluate the issue. I started to understand everything and even accepted it and found a way to deal with it. It was amazing. So after that every year at least once I would trip either with people or by myself. I recommend until you become experienced with tripping don't do it by yourself.
Tripping also heightens your senses to colors you never noticed and also tastes and smells. It opens up all the little things you take for granted in every day life and blows it up to the point you become inf actuated with it and love it. It also can be quite a great high and just a plain old good time.
But you can also have some bad ones. You can lose con troll of yourself really easy if you let it happen and all it takes is one bad thought or feeling and then it is all down hill from there. But even after bad trips and good ones your mentality changes after. I can't explain it thoroughly enough for people who never experienced it but it is almost like becoming enlightened. I don't recommend doing these for a high or something to get fucked up on. I recommend using it for a spiritual ritual. You can have a really good time on it and it is far from addictive. Imagine laughing non stop for 15 minutes or listening to music and hearing every instrument play through your body and vibrate your inner child. Imagine during the fall time and all the gorgeous leaves from the trees light up like it was Christmas almost like mother nature is putting on a grand show for you. This is a drug I highly recommend I could go on for ever about this but I rather let you all experience it for yourself because every trip is different just like every person is.

My Hatred For Money

Money we all need it. You can not possibly live with out it, or you can't live with out it in the areas where currency is so important. I could go move to a third world country and live by the land and have a good life but living in America it is not that easy. With how the world is here it is like money is our life line. With out it you can't have a roof over your head or feed your belly. But what I'm mostly getting is at is what money can do to people. I seen it first hand split families apart by greed of what people think they should be getting. It also has now split two of my best friends apart because of something that doesn't even breathe. It sickens my stomach in how something that is just a piece of paper could have such a strong impact on our lives. I will admit it if I had lots of money I wouldn't have the problems that I have now. It is not very Buddhist of me to say this because I am supposed to follow a way of life that is not materialistic but it is not that easy when everything is being shoved in your face about what the better way of life is defined by having a good sum of money in your pocket.
Even trying to get girls around here the first thing they look at is - is this guy a bum or could he support me? Not every woman is like this but I bet you the majority of women are. Don't believe me how about if I were to say "would you like to go out with me? We can catch the bus around this time then walk a few minutes to this nice restaurant that is having great prices on soup." Its all about who's got the nice car, who dresses with the expensive name brands - do you know a shirt that is really expensive could look like a piece of shit compared to a much cheaper one but the fact that people know it is very expensive makes it look a lot better - Like What the Fuck has anyone seen what Versace clothing looks like? I could take two of the same items then on one just change the name to a name brand one and see which one will sell more. Guarantee it will be the one with the name brand.
Money is what makes the world go round and it is so fucking true, there is not even any exaggeration to that. Like I would love to have a job where I can write or be a personal trainer and a nutritionist or even be able to teach yoga. But those things don't pay the bills so instead I work my ass off in a place I don't really like that is very stressful at times because it pays better. I also see my family in a sad mood because we don't have money. Some people look down at us because there is like seven people living under the same roof or how I used to be criticized about sharing a room with my sister because we couldn't afford to build another room for me to live in. This didn't bother me one bit but I hated how people would think that way. Or another one is with my other family and they used to own a good business that brought in some good income. Things went down hill and they were all worried about not being able to vacation in good spots or not having the nicest of things. We should not have to worry about these things but this is what the culture of money has done to us all.
I never really had lots of money so I could care less. But I am still affected by this because you would never see me driving a fucking Kia or going to a night out in a club with a shirt I purchased at Wallmart. I wish there was something I could do about this but money is tattooed into our culture and this one will never go away or fade out.