My Obsession with Asian Women

Well I have an addiction and I plan on keeping it for awhile. I am addicted to Asian women. I grew up around a lot of Asians and my first crush as a kid was an Asian girl. All sorts of them too. Big ones, small ones, ugly ones, fine ones, stupid ones, geeky ones, and so on and so forth. It is an extremely strong fetish for me. They just turn me on and I can never get sick of them at all. I believe they are God's greatest creation when it comes to women, he gave it all he got when it comes to these girls. But I have not yet been able to have one as a lover. This actually leads to a funny story of mine.
So there is this older Vietnamese woman (my favorite of the Asian nationality) who I just love. She is in great shape and she is petite with a slamming body and such a cute ass that you don't really find on Asian women (sorry girls but it is true). Plus she is all together a great girl. So I have been trying for years to get close to her. While I was getting close to her I came to realize how cool of a person she is and we just became the infamous "F" word (friends). So sex is now out of the question. My dreams were a little shattered but a good thing came from this - she introduced me to her niece.
One day she asked me if I was interested in marrying an Asian girl. I thought at first - great I am going marry a woman so she can come into the country. So she showed me a picture and it blew my mind away. She was so incredibly gorgeous. So I thought I will give it a shot. So we started to e-mail each other now and then. The more I came to know her the more I started to fall for this girl. I also found out she didn't want to get married at first which was great because I know she was not just using me for a citizenship.
This girl is the girl of my dreams. She is an excellent painter, a great singer with such a beautiful voice (she sings me a song every weekend when we talk on the phone), and she is so kind hearted. I hit the lotto on this woman. She stole any type of love I have for any other woman and all I can think of is her. Everyday all I think of is her and it is great to be in love which I have never experienced before. We have been talking for two years now and I have not been with a woman since (as long as the women in pornography doesn't count). Plus this relationship was built on communication and not mistaken through what I think is love through sex (which I am not knocking down).
It is funny how the world works and how my life goes. I am going to Vietnam in August to marry her. I figured a marriage would probably work better through not knowing a person at all and one from a whole different culture then one that you do know because most of the marriages that I have seen where the people knew each other has ended badly. But this is how far my love for Asian women has led me - to go all the way to Vietnam to marry one.
Oh yeah learning Vietnamese is not that easy one word could mean several different things by just the way you say it. But I am looking forward to this experience and finally being able to touch the woman of my dreams and be able to know what she smells like, feels like, and tastes. I didn't intend that to be in a sexual way even if the people that do know me would not believe that at all but really I've fallen head over heals for this girl. Many thanks to the Gods for granting me this opportunity and I promise I will never have a tear fall from my lover's face. I love you with all my heart Phuong.
PS. the picture above is not her but my favorite porn star Asa Akira, I don't have a picture of my wife on this computer I will post one of her later. But hey check out Asa Akira she is awesome at making what she does look good.

Obese Individuals Taking Cah-Cah in Small Spaces

Yes it has been quite some time since I have blogged, I have been very busy and I have some extensive catching up to do. One thing that I would like to start with is why do fat people like to shit in small spaces. Take me as an example, I am far from large but yet the more open space I have in a bathroom the better I feel. If I had to take a pick from a large spaced stall to a small space stall I'm most likely going to go with the large spaced one. Now I have a few fat friends. And I have noticed every time they go and shit they go to the small spaced stall all of the fucking time. Is it some type of comfort zone thing. OR perhaps it is for them to brace themselves against the walls to help endure the tedious amount of shit coming out of their ass from gorging all god damn day.
Yes it is funny how I pick these things up. So I decided to go do some research and take a shit in a small spaced stall. Frankly it sucks. For one everything is so fucking close to you which you don't want when it comes to public bathrooms. Second is that when you have to go and open the door or close it your all rubbing your shin over the rim of the toilet (fucking yuk). So I am uncertain why a fat man shits in small spaces. But I do know when it comes to main public bathrooms the handicapped toilet is the last one you want to use for good sanitation because everyone loves pissing in the retarded reserved stall and getting piss everywhere.

Trajic Comedy

There are a great number of comedians out there. There are also a great number of comedians who are no longer with us. Most of these comedians have met an end by force, violence, drug addiction, or suicide. What is the relation with great comedians and the funny persona they use as a curtain to hide behind. Most of them are really depressed or fucked up people. Could it perhaps be that a comic sees life differently then we do and they tend to over analyze things opening a door of realization that they just can't stand. Or would it be the lifestyle of a comedic that drives them to this demise because of a life full of spotlight and when they are not at their peak it is quickly taken away. Or they know they are better than most people and the can't stand to talk to normal people almost going on an intellectual level. I write about this because one of my favorite comedians Artie Lang has just tried to commit suicide by stabbing him self nine times. He was a drug addict but usually when you see him he is a cheery dirty man. Chris Farly died by an overdose of all sorts of drugs. Talking from experience of being an addict myself people don't get that high with out trying to escape from something. It is sad how such good talent is haunted with troubles. I would like to have a moment of silence for all the great jokers who have left us.

My Dog is Dead

Yes my dog is dead. We had to put him unexpectedly down last Christmas Eve, and on top of that it was his birthday. Poor bastard. And if anyone says putting down a dog through a Vet is humane well you didn't experience what I went through when we did it to my dog. First the poor dog knew and shit everywhere. Second the stuff they gave him must have not been enough because when they left the room so me and my mother could have a minute with him he started convulsing and his lips curled up. This was the saddest fucking thing I have ever experienced. I will never have a dog again and go through this shit again. I can't imagine what it must feel like when people lose their kids. I'm going to skip that feeling by getting my nuts snipped.
But all jokes aside it was pretty depressing. His head or his mental state was fine but his body couldn't take it no more. I wish I could have spent more time with him or been there for him a little more. I took his company for granted and "shooed" him away when ever he bothered me for some love. I feel like a big bag of shit stuffed into another big bag of shit.
So basically what I am trying to get at is don't take your loved ones for granted. Even when they are annoying as shit and you want to tell them to go fuck themselves. Because one day you may not be able to tell them to go fuck themselves ever again.

Midget Sex or Pedophelia

With my daily web browsing of pornography I usually come across midget sex now and then. Also sometimes I watch it. Now I usually get a good laugh when it is a midget man with an enormous dong railing some girl, but I don't laugh so much when it is a full blown man railing a midget woman. Yes what I stated was pretty contrary but I get the feeling when it is a midget woman that it is sort of like child pornography. And well I'm sort of not big into child pornography at all, not even a little bit, I actually just gagged at seeing the word child in front of pornography.
So I came up with a solution that could help out pedophiles (Not that I would want to help them out, but anything to steer them away from children I will do), lets give them midgets instead of kids. Hey I know, what about the poor midgets? Well to be honest I could give a fuck less. If a midget has to have sex with some creep in order for a child not to get fucked in the head for the rest of their lives then lets go for it. And there must be some midget whores out there who don't care about being degraded or violated.

Public Transportation

Because of my inability to follow the law I must now take public transportation. My free rides all been ridden out and now I have to succumb to getting around by the bus. It is not so bad if you don't have to wait in the freezing cold for a late bus or happen to miss a bus by 15 seconds while it is raining cats and dogs outside while you are running beside the bus yelling at the stupid fucking driver to stop for a minute. But if you can get by that its pretty cool. You get to see the inside of your city or area and find all the beautiful and interesting people who live in your area.
For example the "fat people who don't like to take baths", the "I lost all my teeth five years ago and I'm going to keep on smiling to let you all know" people, the "I have five kids from all different fathers and I don't like to discipline them when they run around and scream" people, the "lets talk extremely loud on my cell phone and act bad ass so people think I'm cool" people, the "Just go out of the mental hospital" people, the "going to rehab" and "coming out of rehab" people, and so on and so forth.
Also while waiting for the bus you meet a lot of great people like one of my favorites the "can I have a dollar for the bus I never take" people and the "can I have some change I am not a bum" people. You know if they would just ask me for a dollar with out the lame ass excuse I would give them one every fucking time. Then what is even better that I love because they hold my ass up from getting on the connecting bus or miss it all together is the "Where did my money go or can anyone break a twenty dollar bill?" people and what is even better about them is it happens to them all of the fucking time.
Then you got the bus drivers a whole different kind of people. They are mostly cool and laid back but some are real fucking assholes. I guess having to deal with some stupid people or having to deal with people that give them attitudes they now all think everyone is like that. I had one talk to me like a child and told me to hold on til they come back around and pick me up on the opposite side. Now technically if I wanted to be an asshole (which I am) I had a 30 day bus pass and I can use the bus as much as I want. But I decided to listen to the cunt and put on a big smile when she came back around 20 minutes later. She was surprised I was still there and she was surprised I was still smiling. See you got to fight bullshit with friendliness.

Good Morning Mr. Wood

Morning Wood? What is the big deal with this. Honestly everyone since I was a teen has talked about their morning wood or has made a comment on morning wood. I will tell you no lie when I say I have never ever had morning wood. Since I have first heard of this phenomenon I have been just ready to wake up to a smurf tent. But no not even a chubby.
Now there is nothing wrong with my junk, I get random hard-ons all of the time. I think I actually get more than the regular Joe. I can direct the flow of blood right to my penis with out thinking of sex, it could happen at any minute even right now as I write.
So what is the deal with me not getting any major wood in the morning. Perhaps I have delayed erections and instead of getting a boner when I wake up, it decided to pop up while I brush my teethe.
I don't know but I am not sure why this has never happened to me, and I am starting to feel left out in the conversations when guys talk about their morning wood and I have to make some shit up like how Steve Carrel talked about feeling boobies in the 40 Year Old Virgin.